Even before he was born, our son Finn was teaching me powerful things about love - things I had longed to experience. I’m not sure if my heart was hard or asleep, but through my child, God has been showing Himself so loving, good and true. And my heart has softened and beats more wholly.
This is the beginning of how I’m coming to love and be loved by God in a more real way -
Peter was a friend of Jesus who changed the world because he knew Jesus’ love, acceptance and redemption. He once said this - “Though you have not seen Him, you love Him; and even though you do not see Him now, you believe in Him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy.” This verse popped in my mind one day while I was pregnant and has remained ever since because -
I loved Finn even though I had not seen him.
I believed in him even though I had not seen him.
And I was filled with an absolutely inexpressible and glorious joy.
It was true that I could love someone I had never seen.
Then the Lord revealed something even bigger to me. The reason I could love Finn so much was because I would soon see him face-to-face. The excitement of one day laying eyes on him, holding him, talking, laughing and listening to that boy sustained and pushed me to enjoy the highs of pregnancy and to persevere in the midst of a heck-of-a-lotta discomfort. It invoked me to get ready for my little guy whom I had never yet seen -
We talked about him.
We planned parties for his arrival.
We designed a room with him specifically in mind.
We bought clothes that he would soon wear.
We wrote letters addressed to him.
We dreamed of who he’d look like. (He looks Jeremy, by the way)
We were absolutely smitten by him.
His daddy and I found so much happiness in the expectation of soon seeing someone we felt we already knew well. And, let me tell you, joy was inexpressible and glorious when we finally saw him.
Then it hit me: this is how it is with Jesus. Though I don’t physically see Him, I believe in Him and love Him. His Spirit is within me and His presence is everywhere at all times. He has worked things out for my good and He has held me together during trials. There is so much evidence of Him, yet I’ve never actually seen the face of Christ.
What if the promise was never given that I would see Him? Loving and pursuing Him would be really hard to do throughout life. He would almost become this mysterious, out-there fantasy; like an idea or wishful thinking.
But this isn’t so.
I will lay my eyes on Him and His on me.
And I began to see that there’s this amazing role reversal when we meet face-to-face. It actually seems like He’s been getting ready to see us too -
He’s talked about us. (John 17)
He’s planned a party for our arrival. (Revelation 19)
He’s designed a place with us specifically in mind. (John 14)
He’s bought us clothes we will soon wear. (1 Corinthians 15)
He’s written letters addressed to us. (all of Scripture)
He’s made us to look like Him. (2 Corinthians 3)
He’s absolutely smitten by us. (Romans 8)
I am so thankful that God is working these truths out in me. Love for Christ is becoming fuller and more natural by this understanding.
Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known. And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love. 1 Corinthians 13:12-13